Unless you live under a rock (If you do, my apologies. I’m sure it’s lovely) I’m going to go ahead and assume you’re familiar with Tiger Woods and the whole infidelity thing. If you’re not, I’ll sum it up. Basically the nerdy black kid who’s crazy domineering father forced him to play golf before he learned how to pee standing up grew up to be the most successful golfer in the whole wide world. Besides making all the old, rich white men who had ruled golf with an iron fist since time began (Or since they invented the aggravating, park-gobbling fucking sport. Whichever came first. What am I? A history major?) pull out their white hair by the roots and gnash their teeth; suddenly Mr. Woods was popular with the ladies. Follow? Good.

Turns out he may have been too popular. And since being married to a gorgeous Norwegian super-model wasn’t quite doing it for him (His name is Tiger. Am I right? Anyone? Oh kiss my ass.), he went and had an affair. Several. Less than a dozen is good. Right?

I know, the history lesson’ s great and all. But what’s the point, Jack? The point is, one of his mistresses wants a public apology. Which mistress? None other than Veronica Siwik-Daniels. Better know as Joslyn James. You can catch Joslyn in Mercenary Pictures recently released Tiger Tamer. I swear I’m not making any of this up.

See, Tiger’s planning on having a news conference February 19th in Florida, presumably to apologize to everyone and admit what a horrible person he is and blah blah blah. Veronica’s attorney, Gloria Allred (yes, that one), says Veronica wants Tiger to “apologize to Veronica by name on Friday for all the anguish and distress that he has put her through.”

Wow. I mean. Wow. So if I understand this correctly, the woman currently starring in “Tiger Tamer”; the porn star known as Hole #10; the sandtrap into which Tiger slipped his wood (Hey I didn’t write this shit. It’s on the frockin’ box cover) wants a public apology??

That takes brass balls my friend. Brass balls.

photo courtesy of xbiz